hi former self, it's me, real self

Thing 5: You never really know if you are where you’re supposed to be.

At 30, I realized that almost everyone I know is at a different place in their life. Some have babies, dogs, families; some are still out partying it up and living like their 20, some of my friends are engaged, married, moving across seas. Some are jobless, some are CEO’s and some are just trying to make a living doing what they love (some making a living doing what they hate). What we are doing now is, well, what we are doing now. How would we ever know what we are supposed to be doing in our lives now with no former self to compare?

I would like to think I am where I should be, I wake up every morning to my fiancé, with whom I fall more and more in love with, I get to clean up Cowbells throw-up and Xanders chewed up tissues in my sleep every night, I wake up and have a great job to go to. I work, I get paid, I buy unnecessary things and I consume a large amount of food. I mean, what more am I supposed to want/do. I am where I think I should be at 30. Problem is, I don’t want anything to do with 30. 30 means “Grown Up” and frankly Im not buying the whole grown up thing just yet. I want to travel, move, buy more unnecessary things; I want to be selfish and not turn our “second bedroom” into a nursery… just yet (speaking of selfish, our second bedroom is actually just a really HUGE walk-in closet… just for me!).

I LOVE that my friends are having babies though, which means I get to awkwardly hold them for as long as I would like and then I get to give them back! When I was twelve I thought I was supposed to have three babies by 30 (thank goodness adults don’t listen to 12 year olds)… I am seriously surprised that Jamie and I have managed to keep our dog and cat alive for this long. That statement alone doesn’t sound very responsible and I am pretty sure if child services were reading this blog (which I am actually pretty certain they are) I would probably be forbidden to have children right now. Plus Xander is definitely still not old enough to babysit, I mean, who poops on the floor when getting their nails done. God he really needs to grow up.


“Life is not a journey to the grave with intentions of arriving safely in a pretty well-preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out and loudly proclaiming ... WOW! What a ride!”