Friday, October 7, 2011
i knew it was true
I have to credit Daily Sparkles for this fact. I do apologize though, I can not credit whomever she stole it from, that's on her ;)
Thursday, October 6, 2011
when did it become this way?
It was like one day I was in my bikini, in the bay, in an inter tube made for an 8 year old, with a beer in my hand, worrying about not spilling my beer and worrying about whether or not we were going to die from getting tangled in the ropes and drowning.
Then I woke up one day and I was in my sweats, in the living room, in rubber gloves made for an 80 year old, with a sponge in my hand trying to scrub our radiators in preparation for winter, worrying about if they were coated in lead based paint and worrying about whether or not we were going to die from breathing in heated lead based paint.
When did it become this way?
Where were the tell tell signs that would show me that things were evolving and that I was getting old and “responsible”. Why didn’t my bank call me when they noticed my debit card went from being used for 30 packs of quantity over quality cans to being used for 6 packs of quality over quantity bottles? Where was the call when I stopped buying $200 boots and started buying $200 worth of cleaning supplies and linens or when I stopped buying microwaveable dinners to buying actual ingredients to make things “from scratch”? Don’t banks pride themselves on detecting when something is “out of the ordinary” on your account?? You know, someone in Spain stole my identity once and drained my bank account, they called me then- and I’m not even remotely as upset about my identity being stolen as I am about being a real responsible adult. At least then my identity was worth stealing. I think the guy from Spain keeps calling me from an unknown number, trying to give me my identity back. He doesn’t even want it anymore (he probably got a look at my student loan bill).
Why haven’t my friends called me to say “Hey Rai, you haven’t partied on a Wednesday in a while, what’s up with that? Are you ill?” Oh right, that’s because they are busy buying houses, building sheds and raising small humans.
Seriously, when did it become this way?
I started a real savings account, not a “saving for Mardi Gras” savings account, an actual savings account, one that has no meaning until “an emergency occurs” (btw, needing a Gucci bag because mine is “so last season” is surprisingly not considered an emergency (so says Jamie)).
I started thinking about my future and making decisions that count beyond “what’s for dinner?” (which is a legitimate future decision if you ask me, it’s tough to know what to eat for dinner, I mean, it depends, am I craving something? Am I PMSing? How long has it been since I’ve had wings? Do I feel like fast food? a sit down dinner? a fast sit down dinner?)
Anyways, I guess it became this way the day I decided to settle down and marry the love of my life or the day I realized I cared more about the quality of our thread count than the quality of my rain boots (other things like handbags, jeans and winter coats are a work in progress) I guess it became this way the day I got a puppy and could no longer leave from work and go straight to Happy Hour on Wednesdays. Either way, I am not necessarily saying I am happy about all these "sudden" changes, but I will say that I wouldn’t have had my life become any other way, but this way...
… Unless I were to accidentally win the lottery, like this woman did. Lucky bitch.
Then I woke up one day and I was in my sweats, in the living room, in rubber gloves made for an 80 year old, with a sponge in my hand trying to scrub our radiators in preparation for winter, worrying about if they were coated in lead based paint and worrying about whether or not we were going to die from breathing in heated lead based paint.
When did it become this way?
Where were the tell tell signs that would show me that things were evolving and that I was getting old and “responsible”. Why didn’t my bank call me when they noticed my debit card went from being used for 30 packs of quantity over quality cans to being used for 6 packs of quality over quantity bottles? Where was the call when I stopped buying $200 boots and started buying $200 worth of cleaning supplies and linens or when I stopped buying microwaveable dinners to buying actual ingredients to make things “from scratch”? Don’t banks pride themselves on detecting when something is “out of the ordinary” on your account?? You know, someone in Spain stole my identity once and drained my bank account, they called me then- and I’m not even remotely as upset about my identity being stolen as I am about being a real responsible adult. At least then my identity was worth stealing. I think the guy from Spain keeps calling me from an unknown number, trying to give me my identity back. He doesn’t even want it anymore (he probably got a look at my student loan bill).
Why haven’t my friends called me to say “Hey Rai, you haven’t partied on a Wednesday in a while, what’s up with that? Are you ill?” Oh right, that’s because they are busy buying houses, building sheds and raising small humans.
Seriously, when did it become this way?
I started a real savings account, not a “saving for Mardi Gras” savings account, an actual savings account, one that has no meaning until “an emergency occurs” (btw, needing a Gucci bag because mine is “so last season” is surprisingly not considered an emergency (so says Jamie)).
I started thinking about my future and making decisions that count beyond “what’s for dinner?” (which is a legitimate future decision if you ask me, it’s tough to know what to eat for dinner, I mean, it depends, am I craving something? Am I PMSing? How long has it been since I’ve had wings? Do I feel like fast food? a sit down dinner? a fast sit down dinner?)
Anyways, I guess it became this way the day I decided to settle down and marry the love of my life or the day I realized I cared more about the quality of our thread count than the quality of my rain boots (other things like handbags, jeans and winter coats are a work in progress) I guess it became this way the day I got a puppy and could no longer leave from work and go straight to Happy Hour on Wednesdays. Either way, I am not necessarily saying I am happy about all these "sudden" changes, but I will say that I wouldn’t have had my life become any other way, but this way...
… Unless I were to accidentally win the lottery, like this woman did. Lucky bitch.
Monday, October 3, 2011
someone should feed me
I decided since I am going to be Facebook free, shopping free, animal and animal bi-product free this month, I am going to have A LOT of time on my hands. I tend to do all 3 of those things pretty often (I will save myself the embarrassment and not break down into percentages how much each of those 3 things make up in my day to day life). Aside from working smarter (different from harder (when are people going to learn that?)) in hopes of climbing a notch higher on the Corporate America ladder, and aside from working out (in hopes to get abs of steel and an ass like Beyonce), I am going to invent a program that will tap into everyone’s WebMD history.
Can you imagine…
Man, this is just too genius to not do.
Can you imagine…
Man, this is just too genius to not do.
is eating your own placenta vegan?
I know, I know, you are probably so sick of hearing this question. Well, rest assured, I have found the answer! So feel free to pass it on the next time you're at the water cooler and you hear your bosses secretary ask you AGAIN "If I ate my own placenta, would it be considered vegan?"
My Google search bar has been getting it’s workout on… I have replaced my usual “how do you spell [insert any word with over 3 letters in it here]?” and “what does [insert any word that you do not learn the meaning of organically by age 10 here] mean?” and “When will Kim Kardashian’s Wedding FINALLY be televised?” to “Is [insert any word that is consumable here] vegan?” Everything I see has become questionable to me, the gum on my desk, the peaches in the cafeteria, the dirt I found in my beans the other night… Can I not bite my nails now? I can’t imagine nail biting being vegan. Hmm, I am going to have to Google that one.
Ok, I regret that. When Googling “is biting your nails vegan” the first thing to surface was a picture of a woman’s placenta with an article attached and in that article they asked whether eating your own placenta is considered Vegan, they came to this conclusion:
“At first thought eating placenta might be an affront to veganism considering the fact that placenta is an animal bi-product. But I think we decided that eating your own placenta did not foster a cruel exploitation of yourself and is, therefore, vegan.”
So, what I gather from this is this: it is ok to eat your own fingernails, but possibly not ok to eat someone else’s fingernails, UNLESS said person has given you permission to eat their fingernails, and in doing so no one becomes victim to cruel exploitation. I also gather that it is NOT vegan to eat your dogs fingernails (since they obviously can not give you written or verbal permission to eat their fingernails). *damn opposable thumbs*
Side note: Thanks to Google I learned it was "opposable thumbs" not "disposable thumbs" and I also learned how to spell "opposable", so thanks Google!
You would think that with all this finger nail talk (BTW I do not bite my (or anybody else’s)fingernails, I was curious for informational purposes only) and seeing placenta recipes online, my appetite would be curbed, but I regret to inform myself that it is still very much there. I was craving mayonnaise in my sleep last night. Although it’s very typical for me to crave food all hours of the night, I usually do not crave condiments alone. Plus I am a Miracle Whip kinda gal, so this veganism stuff is clearly just plain messing with my head.
My Google search bar has been getting it’s workout on… I have replaced my usual “how do you spell [insert any word with over 3 letters in it here]?” and “what does [insert any word that you do not learn the meaning of organically by age 10 here] mean?” and “When will Kim Kardashian’s Wedding FINALLY be televised?” to “Is [insert any word that is consumable here] vegan?” Everything I see has become questionable to me, the gum on my desk, the peaches in the cafeteria, the dirt I found in my beans the other night… Can I not bite my nails now? I can’t imagine nail biting being vegan. Hmm, I am going to have to Google that one.
Ok, I regret that. When Googling “is biting your nails vegan” the first thing to surface was a picture of a woman’s placenta with an article attached and in that article they asked whether eating your own placenta is considered Vegan, they came to this conclusion:
“At first thought eating placenta might be an affront to veganism considering the fact that placenta is an animal bi-product. But I think we decided that eating your own placenta did not foster a cruel exploitation of yourself and is, therefore, vegan.”
So, what I gather from this is this: it is ok to eat your own fingernails, but possibly not ok to eat someone else’s fingernails, UNLESS said person has given you permission to eat their fingernails, and in doing so no one becomes victim to cruel exploitation. I also gather that it is NOT vegan to eat your dogs fingernails (since they obviously can not give you written or verbal permission to eat their fingernails). *damn opposable thumbs*
Side note: Thanks to Google I learned it was "opposable thumbs" not "disposable thumbs" and I also learned how to spell "opposable", so thanks Google!
You would think that with all this finger nail talk (BTW I do not bite my (or anybody else’s)fingernails, I was curious for informational purposes only) and seeing placenta recipes online, my appetite would be curbed, but I regret to inform myself that it is still very much there. I was craving mayonnaise in my sleep last night. Although it’s very typical for me to crave food all hours of the night, I usually do not crave condiments alone. Plus I am a Miracle Whip kinda gal, so this veganism stuff is clearly just plain messing with my head.
Saturday, October 1, 2011
Gone Vegan...
I am going to back track to yesterday, my preparation to go Vegan. First off, I had to drive across the city for 35 mins just to get to a store that sold Vegan groceries (this is where I miss CA a lot, you can buy vegan on every corner there). Anywho, so I slipped on my sheep skin and wool Uggs, grabbed my leather bag and started my journey across town to become a bonafide vegan! I had done all of my due-diligence, I emailed myself A) Directions to and from the store (it’s seriously hard to navigate in this city) B) 3 vegan recipes for the week and C) anything else we would need to go complete vegan without a hitch!
Of course, I left my phone in my room, so this was of no help to me what so ever. I got lost going there AND coming back and without a grocery list, I spent hours reading every ingredient on every possible thing in the store. UNTIL I realized that at Trader Joes they put a Vegan stamp on all things Vegan! (awesome) (yet another reason I love TJ’s so freaking much!!) So I just threw every single thing in my cart stamped Vegan and called it a success! Whew!!
Ok, so now it’s day one of my Veganism (word?) and so far so good… I have only had breakfast, so I am not speaking from much experience (yet). I will share my eatings today but I will save everyone the boring details on my everyday eatings going forward (I tried that last year as a vegetarian and I started boring myself of my own blog posts.)
So far- Breakfast:
Vegan Berry Oat Bran Muffin w/vegan substitute spread NOT cream cheese (that’s literally what its called on the package: vegan substitute spread NOT cream cheese)
Enriched Farina Hot Wheat Cereal w/chopped bananas
Pumpkin Coffee with Vanilla Soy Milk
I came to this conclusion, that in the end, it all just tasted like peanut butter without the sweet or without the peanut and actually without the butter part too. It had the consistency of peanut butter, but tasted more like a smacking sound rather than an actual taste, so I washed it all down with several cups of coffee and some water (and I hate water in the mornings) and that was that!
All in all, I am full, so I guess it got the job done.
*sigh*
Only 30 more days, only 30 more days…
Of course, I left my phone in my room, so this was of no help to me what so ever. I got lost going there AND coming back and without a grocery list, I spent hours reading every ingredient on every possible thing in the store. UNTIL I realized that at Trader Joes they put a Vegan stamp on all things Vegan! (awesome) (yet another reason I love TJ’s so freaking much!!) So I just threw every single thing in my cart stamped Vegan and called it a success! Whew!!
Ok, so now it’s day one of my Veganism (word?) and so far so good… I have only had breakfast, so I am not speaking from much experience (yet). I will share my eatings today but I will save everyone the boring details on my everyday eatings going forward (I tried that last year as a vegetarian and I started boring myself of my own blog posts.)
So far- Breakfast:
Vegan Berry Oat Bran Muffin w/vegan substitute spread NOT cream cheese (that’s literally what its called on the package: vegan substitute spread NOT cream cheese)
Enriched Farina Hot Wheat Cereal w/chopped bananas
Pumpkin Coffee with Vanilla Soy Milk
I came to this conclusion, that in the end, it all just tasted like peanut butter without the sweet or without the peanut and actually without the butter part too. It had the consistency of peanut butter, but tasted more like a smacking sound rather than an actual taste, so I washed it all down with several cups of coffee and some water (and I hate water in the mornings) and that was that!
All in all, I am full, so I guess it got the job done.
*sigh*
Only 30 more days, only 30 more days…
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
planning a wedding is a breeze
I could do it in my sleep…
If I had $100,000 to spend on it and an extra $30,000 to hire a wedding planner to take care of it all while I caught up on my beauty rest.
I took this wedding as a challenge (I admit for some selfish reasons) See, I have always prided myself on being able to throw a pretty damn good party (caution: mild horn tooting). Example, I threw a party in 2009 that over 2,000 people showed up to. The police even called my place of employment to threaten me with fines if I didn’t call it off (btw the party went on and in the end no one died and I was not fined). Anyways, so when we decided to try to plan a hell of a party for our wedding here in the states, I took the challenge knowing I had this in the bag!
I didn’t, I didn’t have it in the bag… I had a bag and I had a bunch of books and I had a lot of ideas and vision boards and magazines and I watched Bridezilla and My Fair Wedding and spent countless hours on every wedding blog known to man, but my execution was to shit.
We had a year and a half engagement, then we had a year and then out of no where we had 6 months... Still, I thought, I got this! I so got this... I watched several friends have quickie engagements and their weddings went off without a hitch, I figured if someone can throw something together in 3 months, so can I.
So time passed…
And passed…
And boy was I wrong; I so did not “got this”.
Then with some wedding soul searching we realized the real reason behind all of my procrastination (besides my passion for procrastination) is that I didn’t want a traditional wedding. The moment Jamie and I became engaged we had many talks about a dream destination wedding; it’s what we truly whole heartedly wanted from day one. I don’t know why we fought it so hard, well I kinda know why, because we wanted everyone we ever knew and loved to be able to come to our day and celebrate and we knew if we went away somewhere on an island our guestlist would be limited. So we tried, I tried, I really thought I had it in the bag.
Well, we gave up on the bag, and opted for a carryon instead… So now I can say “I got this! I got it in the carryon”! and we could not be more ecstatic to be going through with our dream destination wedding and although we will miss those that will not be able to make it, we know we will have something very special to share with everyone when we get back as husband and wife.
I gotta go start packing my carryon now, because trust me, it will take me 6 months to get it all to fit.
our wedding site
If I had $100,000 to spend on it and an extra $30,000 to hire a wedding planner to take care of it all while I caught up on my beauty rest.
I took this wedding as a challenge (I admit for some selfish reasons) See, I have always prided myself on being able to throw a pretty damn good party (caution: mild horn tooting). Example, I threw a party in 2009 that over 2,000 people showed up to. The police even called my place of employment to threaten me with fines if I didn’t call it off (btw the party went on and in the end no one died and I was not fined). Anyways, so when we decided to try to plan a hell of a party for our wedding here in the states, I took the challenge knowing I had this in the bag!
I didn’t, I didn’t have it in the bag… I had a bag and I had a bunch of books and I had a lot of ideas and vision boards and magazines and I watched Bridezilla and My Fair Wedding and spent countless hours on every wedding blog known to man, but my execution was to shit.
We had a year and a half engagement, then we had a year and then out of no where we had 6 months... Still, I thought, I got this! I so got this... I watched several friends have quickie engagements and their weddings went off without a hitch, I figured if someone can throw something together in 3 months, so can I.
So time passed…
And passed…
And boy was I wrong; I so did not “got this”.
Then with some wedding soul searching we realized the real reason behind all of my procrastination (besides my passion for procrastination) is that I didn’t want a traditional wedding. The moment Jamie and I became engaged we had many talks about a dream destination wedding; it’s what we truly whole heartedly wanted from day one. I don’t know why we fought it so hard, well I kinda know why, because we wanted everyone we ever knew and loved to be able to come to our day and celebrate and we knew if we went away somewhere on an island our guestlist would be limited. So we tried, I tried, I really thought I had it in the bag.
Well, we gave up on the bag, and opted for a carryon instead… So now I can say “I got this! I got it in the carryon”! and we could not be more ecstatic to be going through with our dream destination wedding and although we will miss those that will not be able to make it, we know we will have something very special to share with everyone when we get back as husband and wife.
I gotta go start packing my carryon now, because trust me, it will take me 6 months to get it all to fit.
our wedding site
Thursday, September 22, 2011
#holycrapimgettinhitched
So we decided on a venue (FINALLY)... As much as we would have loved a Charlotte wedding, we just could not let go of our dream destination wedding. So we decided to make it happen (and oh its happening!). So on April 1, 2012 we will become husband and wife on this fine white sandy beach:
Excellence Playa Mujeres
Excellence Playa Mujeres
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Sanity and sleep go hand in hand, which explains a lot actually
Anyone who knows me knows about my intense battle with insomnia and by intense, I mean, I pretty much haven’t slept since elementary school and even then I remember lying awake countless nights sneaking to watch M.A.S.H and The Insomniac show with Dave Attell after my parents have gone to bed. I have no idea why I can't sleep; My parents sleep, I have a sister that’s basically narcoleptic and a fiancé that can take a 20 min power nap in his car during a lunch break. I actually get upset with people who can sleep; as a matter of fact it’s probably been an issue in past relationships: “Why did you guys break up?” me: “The jerk sleeps so peacefully at night, can you believe the nerve?”… Sounds completely logical right? Well, I have decided to grow up on that front and realize that it is probably not normal to be angry at people who do a very natural and normal thing.
side note: (I’ve KINDA realized this; it’s a work in progress)
I’ve tried everything. I mean everything… from counting sheep (seriously), to herbal remedies (melatonin, valerian root, Chamomile), to Tylenol PM, Advil PM, Motrin PM, to Ambien, Sleepy time tea, Benadryl, a glass of wine, a bottle of wine, a mixture of all of the above, etc… The list goes on. It’s astounding how desperate you get for some R & R.
So as of late I have tried this short term remedy: no caffeine after noon and then I take 2 OTC sleeping pills at 9:30pm to keep me asleep (and not to mention makes me EXTREMELY groggy in the AM) but unfortunately does not put me to sleep, so therefore I also take 1 OTC sleeping pill to put me to sleep (but doesn’t not keep me asleep (ugh, it’s a vicious cycle really)) immediately at 10:30pm.
This combo has proven to give me about 2-2.5 hours of sleep a night…. Which is surprisingly long hours for me, one who is used to absolutely no sleep to roughly 15-20 minutes of awkward dreaming/night tremors a night, sans being heavily sedated.
But the newest thing to throw a kink in my already questionable sleep patterns has been that Jamie has adapted a new nighttime routine where he starts petting my face and hair randomly in the middle of the night. (yeah, it’s ok, go a head, picture it) Now, this probably sounds romantic and sweet to some and possibly creepy to others, and I understand that all too well, but it scares the shit out of me in the middle of the night and it’s REALLY hard to yell at someone for doing such a nice/sweet/weird/romantic gesture. Sleeping medicine does weird things to you and I am no exception and neither is Jamie (sometimes he will take OTC sleepy time meds just to make me feel semi normal- what a gentleman huh?) Anyways, he always has some great excuse as to why he is doing it. Last night went like this:
3:01am
Me: (waking up to Jamie’s hands in my hair and then my face slowly poking me in the eyes)“Jamie, WHAT are you doing?? This is the second time tonight you have woken me up by petting my face, this seriously needs to stop!”
*silence*
3:03am
Me: “Seriously, whats your deal?? Are you even awake right now? Are you punishing me for something, because its working!”
Jamie: “Huh what? Oh yeah, I just knew that was important to you?”
Me: at a lost for words
Me: “What was important to me?? What are you talking about? You’re asleep huh, you little shit- I hate you sometimes”
Jamie: “Its for you”
Me: “Whats for me?”
*silence*
3:05am
Me: “Ugh, great now the dog needs to go out”
Jamie: “Oh yeah, that’s what’s important to you, the dog needs to go out”
Me: “You can’t be serious”
3:09am
Jamie sleeps soundly while I am up… for the REST of the night.
Surprisingly this wasn’t the first night this has happened, and I have a feeling it wont be the last.
I haven’t slept for 30 years and I am freaking exhausted. If any one has any solution that they have found to actually help, please by all means, share! This doesn’t count for those of you that have had trouble falling asleep “that one night” so you drank warm milk and then conked out like a baby. I am talking to those of you that have literally cried tears in the middle of the night asking God what you did wrong in a past life for him to grant you a lifetime of sleepless nights. Do you know how much thinking a woman can accomplish in an entire 8 hour span of laying in bed in silence? A scary amount. You think a long day at work is tough? Try having a long day at work that carries into the night where you get to lay in bed for 8 hours thinking about your long day at work only to turn around and have another long day at work the next morning having had ZERO sleep in between to maintain your sanity. Sanity and sleep go hand in hand I've heard, which explains a lot actually.
So needless to say, if you are ever up in the wee hours of the night and you have nothing better to do just BBM me, cause I’m probably just laying there thinking about alien abductions and their correlation with crop circles, whether or not there is good profit in owning a coffee shop and what color I would paint the walls, or I will be wondering how many people from America’s Most Wanted have been found from watching the show and if I watched the show would I even know if I came face to face with one of the most wanted or would I fail America at turning this person in because “I know I’ve seen him somewhere, just not sure, work maybe?” and whether or not the rug in the living room is centered enough to give the space enough dimension and depth without looking cluttered-- all while I’m trying to figure the words out to the song stuck in my head that I know I know, but I don’t know.
Exhausting huh?
side note: (I’ve KINDA realized this; it’s a work in progress)
I’ve tried everything. I mean everything… from counting sheep (seriously), to herbal remedies (melatonin, valerian root, Chamomile), to Tylenol PM, Advil PM, Motrin PM, to Ambien, Sleepy time tea, Benadryl, a glass of wine, a bottle of wine, a mixture of all of the above, etc… The list goes on. It’s astounding how desperate you get for some R & R.
So as of late I have tried this short term remedy: no caffeine after noon and then I take 2 OTC sleeping pills at 9:30pm to keep me asleep (and not to mention makes me EXTREMELY groggy in the AM) but unfortunately does not put me to sleep, so therefore I also take 1 OTC sleeping pill to put me to sleep (but doesn’t not keep me asleep (ugh, it’s a vicious cycle really)) immediately at 10:30pm.
This combo has proven to give me about 2-2.5 hours of sleep a night…. Which is surprisingly long hours for me, one who is used to absolutely no sleep to roughly 15-20 minutes of awkward dreaming/night tremors a night, sans being heavily sedated.
But the newest thing to throw a kink in my already questionable sleep patterns has been that Jamie has adapted a new nighttime routine where he starts petting my face and hair randomly in the middle of the night. (yeah, it’s ok, go a head, picture it) Now, this probably sounds romantic and sweet to some and possibly creepy to others, and I understand that all too well, but it scares the shit out of me in the middle of the night and it’s REALLY hard to yell at someone for doing such a nice/sweet/weird/romantic gesture. Sleeping medicine does weird things to you and I am no exception and neither is Jamie (sometimes he will take OTC sleepy time meds just to make me feel semi normal- what a gentleman huh?) Anyways, he always has some great excuse as to why he is doing it. Last night went like this:
3:01am
Me: (waking up to Jamie’s hands in my hair and then my face slowly poking me in the eyes)“Jamie, WHAT are you doing?? This is the second time tonight you have woken me up by petting my face, this seriously needs to stop!”
*silence*
3:03am
Me: “Seriously, whats your deal?? Are you even awake right now? Are you punishing me for something, because its working!”
Jamie: “Huh what? Oh yeah, I just knew that was important to you?”
Me: at a lost for words
Me: “What was important to me?? What are you talking about? You’re asleep huh, you little shit- I hate you sometimes”
Jamie: “Its for you”
Me: “Whats for me?”
*silence*
3:05am
Me: “Ugh, great now the dog needs to go out”
Jamie: “Oh yeah, that’s what’s important to you, the dog needs to go out”
Me: “You can’t be serious”
3:09am
Jamie sleeps soundly while I am up… for the REST of the night.
Surprisingly this wasn’t the first night this has happened, and I have a feeling it wont be the last.
I haven’t slept for 30 years and I am freaking exhausted. If any one has any solution that they have found to actually help, please by all means, share! This doesn’t count for those of you that have had trouble falling asleep “that one night” so you drank warm milk and then conked out like a baby. I am talking to those of you that have literally cried tears in the middle of the night asking God what you did wrong in a past life for him to grant you a lifetime of sleepless nights. Do you know how much thinking a woman can accomplish in an entire 8 hour span of laying in bed in silence? A scary amount. You think a long day at work is tough? Try having a long day at work that carries into the night where you get to lay in bed for 8 hours thinking about your long day at work only to turn around and have another long day at work the next morning having had ZERO sleep in between to maintain your sanity. Sanity and sleep go hand in hand I've heard, which explains a lot actually.
So needless to say, if you are ever up in the wee hours of the night and you have nothing better to do just BBM me, cause I’m probably just laying there thinking about alien abductions and their correlation with crop circles, whether or not there is good profit in owning a coffee shop and what color I would paint the walls, or I will be wondering how many people from America’s Most Wanted have been found from watching the show and if I watched the show would I even know if I came face to face with one of the most wanted or would I fail America at turning this person in because “I know I’ve seen him somewhere, just not sure, work maybe?” and whether or not the rug in the living room is centered enough to give the space enough dimension and depth without looking cluttered-- all while I’m trying to figure the words out to the song stuck in my head that I know I know, but I don’t know.
Exhausting huh?
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
conversations normal people probably do not have
Jamie: How did you get that gash on your leg?
Me: From a candle at Target
--silence—
Jamie: Um, can you elaborate please?
Me: Yeah, a candle fell off the shelf and gashed my leg, hurt like hell
Jamie: First how does a candle just fall? Did you touch it? And second, how does a cylinder candle do that kind of damage?
Me: Well the candle was in a box, I guess I should have said that part and no I didn’t touch it!
--silence—
Me: Ok, maybe I touched it.
Jamie: Mmmmhmmm that’s what I thought… and what’s the cut on your stomach from?
Me: What cut? Oh the one here (pointing to the cut right above my belly button)?
Jamie: Yeah, that one, whats that from? Target as well?
Me: Target? Don’t be silly! That one is from when I stabbed myself with a knife in my belly, remember?
Jamie: Oh yeah, I remember. Different from the time you almost stabbed me with a knife when I was grilling?
Me: Yeah that was two different days. I almost stabbed you the day after I actually stabbed me.
--silence—
Me: So the conclusion of this story is, you are clearly safe from danger. Me, not so much.
Jamie: Ok, no more knives for you. Or wine glasses, since you have managed to break all of those.
Me: Why no more wine glasses? They aren’t ALL broken!
Jamie: How many do we have?
Me: Like 4
Jamie: How many did we start with?
Me: 22
Jamie: Yeah, my point exactly.
Monday, August 22, 2011
if i could sing, i'd sing this to you
I sleep to the sound of your comfort.
Where I find comfort in your comfort.
The sun cast on your smile wakes me.
Thoughts of you congest my mind.
Love floods the veins to my heart.
My soul is alive.
My days are envious of my nights,
for my nights are surrounded by your presence.
In love comes trial,
but none that we can not face together,
none that we can not conquer.
Tears fall both in joy and pain;
both prove life is present.
Our love has depth and ease.
Our bond is rare.
Our foundation sturdy,
yearning for the structure we will build.
My eyes look forward to our future.
My feet rest for the long journey we create.
My embrace cherishes your embrace.
My body aches for your warmth and my lips for your taste.
I am rich with bliss.
I am poor of envy,
for I have everything.
I sleep to the sound of your comfort.
Where I find comfort in your comfort.
Where I find comfort in your comfort.
The sun cast on your smile wakes me.
Thoughts of you congest my mind.
Love floods the veins to my heart.
My soul is alive.
My days are envious of my nights,
for my nights are surrounded by your presence.
In love comes trial,
but none that we can not face together,
none that we can not conquer.
Tears fall both in joy and pain;
both prove life is present.
Our love has depth and ease.
Our bond is rare.
Our foundation sturdy,
yearning for the structure we will build.
My eyes look forward to our future.
My feet rest for the long journey we create.
My embrace cherishes your embrace.
My body aches for your warmth and my lips for your taste.
I am rich with bliss.
I am poor of envy,
for I have everything.
I sleep to the sound of your comfort.
Where I find comfort in your comfort.
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
steel city
So I know everyone is sick of hearing me go on and on about California… People are like “You left, move on with your life, get over it!” (actually no one has said that to me, but I feel like someone should)
There has been a lot of good that has come out of being home so far. So I am going to take this time to be thankful…
I am thankful….
That I have been able to drive down country roads that take me home to West Virginia for Sunday dinner. I could go without the calories but I can never get enough of things my dad says (I would never say “sh!t my dad says” because after they came out with that God awful show I don’t want to compare my dad to William Shatner, plus they look nothing alike and I am sure William doesn’t play the bagpipes in a kilt)
That I have been able to save money in rent but NOT in car insurance (I would go on and on about how much more expensive car insurance is out here rather than in CA but this post is supposed to be about positive things not negative, so I will save that for the next time I am shitting on living in PA:) ) (and NO this is pre 2 accidents in one week, I can’t wait to see what post 2 accidents in one week car insurance is like)
That I have been able to spend more time with my younger siblings. Yeah I may be a decade plus older than them (ooooh shit, I said it… Im old), but they remind me of my youth and remind me of how freaking grateful I am to NOT be a teenager anymore, oh the drama…
That Jamie and I have been able to upgrade from 700 sq ft to 1400 sq ft, which allows me more room to buy and store more unnecessary things.
For the football season that is about to happen… GO STEELERS!
That I have been able to spend more time with my dearest friend Ali, it has been a blessing being able to see her more in the past 5 months than in the last 5 years… I love you Miss Ali : ) Let the good times roll…
I am thankful for our friends here in this great city and I am thankful that all of our families are closer and I am so very thankful that my fiancé and I are able to grow in our relationship and are able to share this special time in our life here, at home <3
So for all of that Pittsburgh, I thank you :)
*I have to add:
Thank you Mama Koay for always having the most entertaining and hilarious stories to tell about work ( what I would do to follow you around for one full day at Fairmont General :))
Thank you Mom for sharing all of your wisdom and knowledge (how on earth you know so much about the most random things is beyond me (and kinda scary), but thank you for sharing)
and
Thank you Batman, for filming your movie here. That’s kinda cool…
Monday, August 8, 2011
going going back back to Cali Cali
Thank you Biggie, for giving everyone in the world a song to reference when heading to the great state of California.
San Diego, I am tired of missing you, I will be seeing you over Labor Day.
xoxoxox - Rai
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